The Journey within...

(Thoughts that crossed my mind while flying to KL for the much awaited vacation, which changed me, FOREVER ! The Journey outward, was indeed a journey within...)

As the plane cruised between clouds, leaving below the much loved city of Bangalore & associations of yester-years as a rebus absolute !

Three sixty five days, twelve months, one full year ! It takes a lot to change - or so to say, Accept, Adjust & Accommodate to what lies at present, as reality absolute. The journey to outer realization takes a lot of strive to peep within, look inwards to introspect and make sense of existence of body & the soul. To gaze and realize the reason behind flurry of events that race against time. After all, the time in the year bygone, not only sped, but also sprinted in fleeting speed. Glad it's over ! May it rest in peace.

Thirty thousand feet above, amidst wandering mass, while I looked below, gathering a lot of sense of what life has to offer. My senses rejoiced and clamored that the journey (of life) had just begun and I felt elated to ring in to new adventures, with full gusto ! Perhaps I was asleep all this while, perhaps I had not yet acquainted myself with life in real. But, hold on, events that swept by, were those quintessential? What if they had taken some other course? Had things not been coarse, but smooth, could I have seen this day with a new outlook? Perhaps not!

At times it takes a lot of pain in order to realize & appreciate the beauty of this ever complicated life. After all, as the wise ones say, 'Every pain has a purpose'. No wonder, whether pain is self-inflicted or passed on through an extrinsic force, it is essential to experience it. Not once, but multiple times, to chisel out our beautiful self. After all, an earthen pot is beaten many times to carve out a desirable self. A much known philosophy, isn't it? 

The year that swept by, began with apathy, gory revelations, all that was smeared with honeycombed verses, was, in fact, realized to be blanketed with intentions evil. Startled by witnessing duality in beings, I was shattered & broken, for sometime. But, certainly not, for ever ! After all it's not core of my being to stay affected or bothered by something external for long ! Nevertheless, it DID leave an everlasting stench & I DID froze for sometime. Of what was believed to be truth, was indeed manipulation supreme. But, I held on...or perhaps time pushed me ahead.

And time fleeted by, leaving me all the more perplexed...for, what I was witnessing was beyond slightest of assumption that could have touched my conscience. Further worse, things went against my favor, progressed to grey & then ultimately turned blackest black ! And I am glad that I experienced all the pain, for I feel nothing could be more worse in life ! Or perhaps, that's only a perception. I know not...however, I have decided to tread ahead with full vigor.

Gradually, mystery unfolded and reality danced in it's ugliest form. But, I am glad, that it DID ! For, it was indeed an eye-opener, that changed my perspective, ten...errr...no! hundred-folds and for ever ! However, I still wonder, what instigates such foolhardiness in beings as they deal in with their relationships. Yes, I am absolutely clueless ! Of course we are born alone and ultimately die alone as well. But, don't we share lives? Isn't it critical to cultivate 'healthy' relationships & most importantly, cherish them forever? Mulling still !

Nexus

Neither to fend ego,
Nor to feed lust,
And, certainly not to split trust,
Since it is the bedrock,
Which holds strong the structure,
Or, so it must !
Cheer with confidence,
Oh yes !
And then,
Neither flatter, nor scorn,
Existence bilateral & cohesive,
Comprehend silence,
Absorb differences,
Respect space,
Howbeit, 
Not margin out self-world,
Lest to create fisssures or clefts,
Of sorts all !
Live not,
In an unapproachable cocoon,
Share laughter & fears,
Insecurities & dreams,
Highs & lows alike !
Percieved picture perfect,
Is an utopia alone
Nevertheless,
The persistent strive itself,
To maintain a continuum,
To create a semblance,
Of emotions enwrapped,
Timeless & conditionless,
In harmony absolute,
Melodies Medlodicious,
A tightened bond,
Sans bondages !

Lost in the Dark

Inspired by Original Painting using Knife Strokes

Lights in the twilight had dimmed,
Glitter had given way to repose,
Ushered by a reclining face,
Which, usually nights bestow upon,
The city was soon to fall,
Into a deep slumber,

Heedless or sightless,

Of the world, of the mortals,

Who stalk out,

When the fortunate find comfort,

In silken smooth,

Warmth of shielded blanket,

While, the 'tagged' straggler,

Glows like glow worm,

Provocatively suited, 

To suit the context,

Attract to seduce,

Colored in excess,

Blushed, glossy cheeks, 

Douched in mascara,

Deepest black,

Mellifluous boody,

It is her time to rule the street,

Or, is it really ?

Ritzy cars speed by,

Each, deemed to,

Fill in empty pockets,

With coinages or currency alike,

Few tease by, some unwarry,

Of her presence,

Since partnered, 

By partner-in-crime or kin,

Although, gawk almost 

With squint eye,

For socially conditioned norms,

Appreciate straight gaze NOT !

And then, post hours of halt,

A car screeched brakes,

Almost colliding & blowing off,

Closely, by past her,

Dragged in to please,

Gratify the instincts beast-like,

Of the glutton,

Who ripped her apart,

The minimal strands of robe,

Tearing off,

Then there were,

Bruises of all sorts,

Over & done with her,

Strangled her in heart,

With a dagger sharp,

Then, hurled her past the street,

To where she belonged !

Whining in agony,

She shrieked for help,

None to heed ear,

Wilted in pain,

Until the azure up,

Silenced & cleared,

Then, she hushed,

Leaving her torso,

While the soul moved up there,

Liberated eternally,

In peace & break-free,

Chains none, 

& conditions of existence bereft !

Getalong to avenues anew

Winds of hope,
now blow in reverse,
expectations nix,
& from none, 
love that hurts,
traces not even an iota,
cipher emotions,
sans bonds,
in solitude,
without realm of absoluteness,
I wander no longer,
but, trod ahead,
with zeal fullest,
firm in determination,
tenacious in endurance,
despite parsimony,
& test of time,
that lay affront,
multifarious & capacious,
find self,
racing atop,
victorious,
with flying colors,
like a shining star,
I sparkle bright,
applause, honor & recognition,
all at once,
heed appreciation
albeit,
repletion of little joys,
laughter childlike,
by tickling tickles, 
slipped a great deal!
thence, I wonder,
happens what,
when ends to meet, 
meet an end?
a new yardstick to latch on to?
or a break to rejoice, 
in glory absolute? 
whilst I toggle my grey cells,
thoroughfare of time runs by,
new avenues to latch on to, 
surface,
in it's ever mystifying self,
it is only a beginning,
outset of a long journey,
thus, boots of zest are worn again,
as crawling up,
I venture anew,
to a never never land...

Yet another year gone by...

The clock ticks,
Bit by bit,
In fleeting speed,
Time to say goodbye,
To yet another year,
Ephemeral, 
As moments were,
Though leaving imprints,
Of memories,
Some to keep,
Rest to bury deep,
Absolutely by choice,
That is!
Well! have we grown wise?
Or, turned more wild?
A wringer in my thoughts,
Where have we arrived,
& where do we head to?
Perhaps some milestones reached,
Others, to etch out...
Behold! 
Watch out for misleading paths,
For, a folly done once,
Mustn't be replayed,
Although by a mistaken chance!
Firm in determination,
Stiff in aggression,
Let us march along,
To unknown terrains,
Where beauty is sublime,
With pastures green,
All that glitters, 
With a tinge of sheen !
Engraved in a rock,
Year that is gone by, 
May you rest in peace,
While I tread ahead,
With full vigour, courage & zeal,
Twinkling & dreamy eyes !

Faithless

Solus in the crowd,
I gaze at faces,
expressions multitude I witness,
but colorless, anemic & barren,
Conception of reality,
or mere perception I wonder !
Promises are made,
assurance of trust,
claimed transcendental,
but, seems indiscreet,
for, mishaps that are bygone,
leave a stench of unworthiness,
that the heart scorns,
to accept anything,
that carries the tag of faith,
dwelling in a constant despair,
that it would only break me,
to pieces beyond mend,
and then I ponder,
hasn't it done the harm already ? 
fumbling in the muddle,
entrapped & entangled,
in self-inflicted torturous pain,
I interrogate self,
How strange is the affair of life,
it's wrecks, rebuilds 
& shards down to pieces,
all over and again !
And in it's viciousness alone,
gawk it's truth ultimate !

Zoetic Zest

A brisk walk by the sea,
Starry galore high up,
Tides  brushing by,
Breaking the barricades,
Intruding the arcades,
Creating ruffles,
Leaving rumples,
Of sand and gravel,
But, far she has to travel,
& beyond...
Soar high in wild blue yonder,
Words of wisdom to stand by,
Or follow her heart,
For, each has, 
It's own reverberations,
Poisonous potions, 
Blended with intoxication,
Howbeit, to fend self,
Route one, she must tread,
While wrangling in turmoil,
Abuse & misuse,
Is done by,
Leaving her debunked,
In a state, avertible which was,
By virtue of what,
She wondered
Was it,
Assertion of absorption,
OR...
Clarion of demolition?
Silence begets destruction,
OR...
Reveals paths anew?
Shrouded in mystery,
Firmness as a testatory,
Rooted & grounded,
Though pliable & supple,
To an extent,
She lived on...
To express & not to impress
To assert & not to be suppressed!