The Brimming Barrel

Wrapped in timeless unison,

The heart whined for bygone,

Bitter sweet memories of enchantedness,

Transcendental experiences,

Locked tight in deep recesses of soul,

Clamoring escape,

A vent out,

Defenceless love,

Sans fright of odds & Consequences,

Guilt trips, too, 

Did their rounds, 

Every now & then

With respite none,

Whining in pain,

Succumbed to circumstances

But, wait a minute !

It was then,

 

A sneak peek into what lies at current...

Beaming with life,

Overflowing energy surplus,

The barrel is now full,

Sans fear of vacuum,

It is plenty with joy now,

Careful of no leakages,

No room for darkness to peep in,

Subdued nor, neither it is weakened,

Beauty of optimism has touched,

The heart now is replete

What seemed beyond repair once,

Is now mended

With confidence supreme

Casketing sins sour

Trudging afar with every hour

Eureka ! :)

 Droopy eyes of the drudge,

Woke up with a Startle,

As the alarm clock shrieked,

Loudest loud,

After all,  purposed to alert

Jaded & dragged, 

To a yet another longish taxing day,

With respite none,

To relax or unwind,

Stand & stare,

At little joys of life,

Or just to calm, 

The exhausted veins,

Or to socialize,

 & indulge in passions alike,

Producing assembly line,

Of 'insights',

Deemed to create an impact Imperative,

Thus, with an endeavor of meeting demands,

Of the 'Consumer',

Who spends on essentials & luxuries,

Gauging the 'Need gaps',

In Products & services,

To furbish Newness,

So as to 'Appeal'

Delving deep into psyche,

While tying the ropes of,

Emerging Trends & 
Changing Codes of conduct,

Is not largely Facile,

Demands skill, patience & an intellect,

To convert rawness of 'data',

Into actionable standards,

Not 'straight-jacketed',

But, awaits an 'Eureka moment',

Of discovery & unraveling essence,

To appease the 'Marketeers',

Inspire with a spring-board of thoughts,

Of cues triggering strategies,

All this, is indeed interesting & 
& nevertheless involving,

Tickles brain to think creative & 'out of box',

However, the 'assembly line'

Restricts 'creation', isn't it?
Rather a free-spirited & random thought,
At times, or MOST,
Unravels a scheme of interesting wonders?
Ponder ?? Ponder!!

Equilibrium

Striking the right balance,

Tying all essential dots,

Maneuvering in peace,

Leaving behind, 

 Labyrinth of Chaos and confusion,

Neither whiling time in idleness,

Nor investing energies at max,

But, Just right !

So that, the fuel lasts longer,

And a bit more !

To trudge paths unknown,

To experience newness,

A world of beauty and gleam,

Traces of which,

Have begun to reflect,

 In smiles supreme !

Having witnessed beings,

Who burn with passion excess,

And are always at their peaks,

Living in brim,

Lopsided, titled,

Generally stumble down, 

And fall apart,

With speed exact,

Which had blown them upwards,

After all,

The flame that burns twice as bright,

Burns half as long !

Games of Heart

Games of heart are,

Indeed an art,

Rules Charted,

Beautifully carted,

Self-image conned,

With shiny gold glitters,

Pounding & flatter,

A game of dice,

Bagful of lies,

Spin Splinter,

Sugarcoated dwindles,

Victimizing a fool,

Tagged very cool,

Essence of reality,

Not a mentality,

World of fantasy,

Although is sassy,

In long run,

Blinded to an extent great,

Lines are distorted & not straight,

Although heat whines with pain,

Not heeded an ear,

For the one,

who was once so dear,

Emotions pure,

Are a passe,

A world of passing phase,

or fad,

It is !

CARVING OUT MY BEAUTEOUS SELF WITH THE MYSTIC LAW OF CAUSE AND EFFECT

Muddled with multiple challenges in life, I was feeling somewhat lost and seeking the essence of my existence. While contesting with my inner demons (some of those which were also influenced by extrinsic forces), I had begun to gather that it was a futile war, leading to self-defeat. Life seemed bleak and stared at me with a big question mark! A personal loss was taking a huge toll on me. I seemed to have frozen in time, immovable and fixated in past. While time fled in sprinting speed, I stay put, feeling even worse, day by day. Extremely low in self-esteem, it seemed that something had stripped off the confidence from this otherwise bubbly, happy-go-lucky girl. Trust was broken and faith was shaken. Thanks to this loved one who was idolized in yester-years. While I was engulfed amidst these thoughts and found myself trapped on a mud-land, filled with remorse and immense pain, I stumbled upon this supremely powerful practice. 

The rather ‘morbid’ prelude was essential to set the theme right and acknowledge that how the beautiful philosophy of ‘Turning poison into medicine’ has begun to show it’s impact on my self-transformation. How with it’s magical wand, seems to be healing the broken chords of my inner self. Let me admit, when I was acquainted with the practice, a few years back, I was shrouded with a lot of doubt; few being, ”How can chanting something in Japanese” (a language I am unfamiliar with, help strengthen me and bring inner peace?”, “Oh! These letters in Ghonyo book are dancing, just like few letters did for the child suffering from dyslexia in ‘Taare Zameen par’”, “What’s the big deal about Sokka Gakkai, doesn’t it preach on the same lines as other philosophies do?”, “Sharing profound thoughts and experiences with absolute strangers? But, why?”, “What am I missing out, while belonging to a different ‘religion’?”, “Do I need to get into all this, at this young age (now, assuming that I am young J)”, “I have always contested religion or anything attached to it…how will I ‘deal with this?!”,”Will it mean ‘partly renouncing the little joys I seek in indulging in drinks/ partying et al?”,”OMG !where precisely am I headed to?”

While all these questions and many more crossed my mind, I wasted 4 years. And then suddenly, after a long time, when I found myself in a shoddy state, lo & behold ! I stumbled upon it yet again. As if something out there had conspired me to witness this again…this time more closely. Someone out there perhaps wanted me to come out of the rather ‘muddy’ state and bloom beautifully (A close resonance with how the lotus blooms in mud? I know. I thought exactly). I continued to chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, all by myself, somewhat mechanically, for about 6 months (and of course with a lot of irregularity). This was just to divert my mind from ‘negative thoughts’. I was losing faith by each passing day because ‘my external situation’, which I had envisaged to change, was far from getting better.

That was the phase when I started searching online and came across it’s literal meaning; “I devote myself to the mystic law of cause and effect”. Somehow this struck a chord and I spared a thought on it. So, I realized, it was worthwhile to surrender myself to all that was happening (considering that I had least control on cause and effect) and consoled my inner self to stay calm, regardless of the situation. Instead of relying on someone else, I was comforting myself. This was my first encounter with the wisdom of this way of life. In short, without realizing, it had touched my conscience and brought about the ‘clarity’ within myself. As I munched on it furthermore, I felt that by vocalizing and thereby engaging all senses in devotion, is an ideal form of meditation. It brings alive the purpose of imbibing courage and confidence. I further realized that chanting these lines were equated with the roar of a lion, thus symbolizing, a lot of vigour and vitality ! Thus, we emerge, arise and awaken when chant with a lot of conviction and love for it.

Some of the questions that I had were automatically being answered by MYSELF. Such was the impact of chanting ! This was quite empowering. Admitting that little knowledge is a dangerous thing, I was inquisitive to know more about this philosophy. I got ‘formally initiated/shakkubuked’, 3 months back. And a few weeks later, I was introduced to the local district. Till date I have attended a few study and chanting sessions, including one Zadenkai. Let me confess, each meeting has left an intense impact on me. Strangest of all being, that each member, seemed very familiar, as if a bond of past has tied us all together. This awe got clarified (and further strengthened), in one of the study sessions, when it was proclaimed that, “It is not a miracle that we all members are here today, together…a bond of past has drawn us closer. We were closely related to this philosophy even then. The Lotus Sutra affirms that all people, regardless of gender, capacity or social standing, inherently possess the qualities of a Buddha, and are therefore equally worthy of the utmost respect. We all can attain Buddhahood (a condition of absolute happiness, freedom from fear and from all illusions)”. Of what I otherwise know of Buddhism is that it has a deep belief in reincarnation. Some things were getting clarified àWhy the faces seemed familiar, why the rhythmic tonality of the ‘relatively foreign’ verses calmed the soul. Thus, it tied all the loose ends and many questions were answered in that one instance. I walked away, smiling, feeling good that I was introduced to this philosophy, not now, but in past lives as well. Thus, it heightened my conviction in the practice.

Some extracts from Value Creation that have impacted me :

ü  Victory has seeds of defeat in it and vice-versa. Stay calm and tread ahead: How true ! Don’t we get carried away by success? Arrogance seeps in at times and we tend to neglect/ disregard someone else? Or on the contrary, we feel lost and frustrated when confronted with ‘bad’ time. Lotus Sutra explains àWhen change is the only permanent truth and transiency is expected, why get carried away by any situation? Rather a calm composure could help in staying ‘HAPPY’ in any given circumstance. Bang on ! So, ‘In pursuit of happiness’, it is ! J

ü  Complete dedication to victory enables one to summon forth all kinds of ingenuity and creativity. When one is determined, the spring of wisdom will never dry up: So, my victory is determined by my commitment towards it. After all, I am the sole force responsible for my actions and outputs (read: cause and effect?). Amen ! Let the wisdom grow and bloom further, let my willpower increase by leaps and bounds, while I outshine

ü  When roots are deep, leaves shalt not wither: What a beautiful thought ! Scientific with meters of symbolism woven into it.

So, the three pillars (FAITH, STUDY, PRACTICE), when intertwined together, have the capacity to create magic ! I now find myself more calm, sorted and filled with positive energy. I can gauge that I have become more decisive now. The lens of looking within has deepened and perceiving outside has widened. Three months into the practice and such is the impact. Wonder what lies ahead….

The explorer in me seeks a lot of questions, the course and intensity of which, keep altering with time and events. Sometimes I question my questions as well. Confused? Yes ! I am. However, I am gradually learning to, “Question to learn and know; not to doubt”

From ramshackle to powerhouse podium

Sowing grains of hope,
Rowing away, afar, 
Distant from duress,
That pulled down faith,
Caught in a twisted rope,
Immersed in a state of dope,
Soul hollered in vain,
But,Glad !
All that is now defunct,
Turning poison into medicine,
I forge ahead in victory,
Rejoicing the joys of self-hood,
When I look within,
I reflect much of the beauty,
That lies inward,
Now that roots are deepening, 
Shalt not let leaves wither, either,
But, Grow !
To an infinite & immeasurable,
Extent of bloom,
Touch lives of others too,
Carve out their beauteous self,
It's a journey from ramshackle, 
To powerhouse podium,
For,
Essence of humanity, 
Is a revolution indeed !
Holding baton of illumination,
Peace, vigor & prosperity,
I Lead !

Love F(actually!)

While LOVE is multidimensional and speaks of emotions manifold, encompasses multivariate equations/ co-relations between two beings; animate, inanimate and beast alike...regardless of what is the type of alliance, for that matter, a relationship exists at all or not (that, which is definable within defined codes of definitions/ societal definers)...Phew !! a rather infinite pronouncement, isn't it ?! Nevertheless, it's essence is further more diverse and perplexing to the core, enough to bewilder!

However, let me be forthright in expressing that the case in point here is restricted to ‘Romantic love’ only...the one that makes us all drool ! But, really?! In fact, it's complexity intrigues me, leaves me questioning, just like presence of God as an entity baffles the hell out of me ! Yet, I am a firm believer of the unseen, unfelt, but supposedly omnipotence of the 'powerful' force. But, more so, I have faith in Faith and not in any 'physical' form. And I feel the same for the 'emotion' being picked up by my fancy here. However, let me confess, for reasons unknown, so far, I have always followed my heart in 'matters of heart'. I guess, that's how it is deemed to be, isn't it? A rather close resonance? I know!

The above prelude was important to put a perspective in place. More often than not, we witness a lot of chaos around this overtly exploited emotion. Don’t we? What I perceive is, it oscillates between ‘bitter’ and ‘sweet’, sometimes pleasant and in others, gloomy.

So, I recently watched this movie Dedh Ishqiya’, which talks about 7 shades that LOVE encompasses. I was instantaneously backlashed by the mere concept.  However, it stayed in my head for quite some time and grabbed my attention to the core.  This further made me venture out with my ‘green’ thinking cap on. With some bit of reading and exploration, I stumbled upon the fact, that it is all rooted in Arabic philosophy. Quite interesting, I also got to know that the beautiful song ‘Satrangi re’ from the movie Dil se is also about the same. Deftly penned by Gulzar, knitted into music by A.R.Rehman and brought alive by Sonu Nigam’s voice, this one’s surely a sight, extremely artistic and figurative, woven into meters of symbolism. This song is played at all major turning points of the film where the characters cross each of these 7 check points leading ultimately to their death. Inexorably drawn towards each other, the crescendo of love goes on increasing unchecked.

Needless to mention, it was beyond my comprehension when I had heard it for the first time. I was relatively younger then and the love bug (in whatever form) was yet to hit my conscience.

Precisely, all of us journey through one or more of these 7 stages (at least once in life-time, with one person or multiple!): 

1.      Attraction (Hub): It sparks off when eye meets eye (or anything for that matter!) Completely engulfed in enchantment, this is the stage when all negative traits are ignored. Respite is found in commonalities. There are butterflies in the stomach and fluttery heart doesn’t stop beating. Captivated, this is sweetest amongst all stages.

2.      Infatuation (Uns): At this stage, love begins to intensify, which means, amongst all things, ‘to become red in the face’, suggesting that the love is now having a physical effect on the lover.

3.      Love (Ishq): It is the peak of the feel good involved in the process. If this point is crossed, the bliss starts decreasing. We can't say whether pain starts after this stage or not, but the ideas of bliss and pain start getting increasingly impersonal. If love crosses this point, there usually is no turning back.

Most halt at these three phases and breaks are drawn at the subconscious level because what lies ahead is unstoppable destruction.

4.      Reverence (Aqeedat): An object one initially was infatuated with and attracted to, becomes the object of reverence which leads to it becoming an object of worship.

5.      Worship (Ibadat): The object of worship is elevated to a higher pedestal where nothing can be wrong with the object. There can be no negotiations about the infallibility of the object. Interesting thing is, until this point, the duality of lover and beloved is maintained. Although the object becomes infallible and utmost important, this is not the point where the identity of person is lost.

The next 2 steps are so insanely dangerous that few dare to tread upon…

6.      Obsession (Junoon): Here, slowly, person starts identifying whole-heartedly with the object of his obsession. To such an extent that the existence-nonexistence of the object becomes the matter of one’s own existence-nonexistence.

7.      Death (Maut): The Final stage, Death. This can be literal as well as figurative. Destruction of a person/ relation/ ego et al.

Phew! Seems I have chewed on this quite a bit. However, this makes a lot of sense to me and I have begun to look at it from a different angle.

Let's admit, just like God (read: faith), Love is also very much personal...so, it's all about my love/ your love/ his love/ her love/ their love and so on. No one can feel it for the other. A universal definition is no good ! I don’t think it could be defined. It would be injustice to both the ‘feeling’ and it’s definition in itself ! And certainly, there is no right or wrong way of being 'in love'. Have we arrived at any consensus with the endless quibbles on whether my faith is fairer than yours? Perhaps not ! It's a futile war. After all, how can one contest an emotion, a feeling? Again, our comprehension is limited to social conditioning. Whatever might be the instrument of ‘socialization’, our belief system is institutionalized by what we gather along the way.

Nevertheless, I strongly feel it is critical to confess/ confront/ acquaint the significant other(s)on one’s take on love before plunging into a so-called 'relationship' or conning one for attainment any sort of 'personal pursuits'. World is infinite and we are deemed to find people with similar bent of mind, who, not only nod with our line of thinking/ rationalizing, but also might reciprocate feelings in the similar way, as we do.

Ever wondered, why is the beautiful emotion abused and misused to an extent that we get panic attacks at times...refrain from plunging (read: falling) in love, once bruised? So, there is just one basic principle in love...Transparency ! It is indeed a straight and simple way to deal with all the complications, a sure shot precaution for any (ouch!) ‘heart ache’. Express feelings as they are and allow the other person (whom you 'love') take cognizance of your faith (read: love). I don't think there is any alternate way ! Now, a million dollar question arises…what if it's not reciprocated? Well ! in that case, move on, buddy ! Explore a like-minded partner... After all, we are huge a species! But, do not keep someone in dark…You must reveal the deepest recesses of your soul, your stance on love. Let the person ‘respect’ you and not the mask that you tend to portray!

Hmmm...So, I stumbled upon a quote recently, which kind of shook me, left me with a reality check. It was, "Follow your heart, but take your brain with you" Demystifies the mystery?! Somewhat, indeed !